firicia
11-07-2007, 10:42 PM
I just had the strangest experience.
I fasted for 6 days and then started eating SAD again. Tonight 2 days back into eating I had a "light bulb moment".
I guess you could call it a total break down. Crying, anger, frustration, fear, anxiety, some more crying, and then depression. All of these came flooding through me in a matter of minutes. I got really scared, especially because how depressed I felt. Then the "ah ha" moment... am I really unhappy for no reason, or am I poisoned?
I thought about it for a moment. Just a few days ago my mood was the best I have been in years through fasting, same with the 14 days straight I was able to be raw in the summer. So maybe I'm not unhappy, maybe I'm not a negative person, and maybe my life really isn't a mess, and my body isn't a complete disaster uncapible of being fit, healthy, or beautiful again. Maybe I am having a very strong reaction to the foods that are going in my body.
This may seem silly, but seriously this feels like a big wake up for me. It's one thing to read it, hear other people say it, but to experience it first hand... wow. I feel like I have been living this life I thought was normal, but it turns out that I can feel so much better.
Just thought I would share this. I honestly feel a little scared, wondering where to go from here. I'm sure it will all work out.
Have a rawsome day everyone.
I fasted for 6 days and then started eating SAD again. Tonight 2 days back into eating I had a "light bulb moment".
I guess you could call it a total break down. Crying, anger, frustration, fear, anxiety, some more crying, and then depression. All of these came flooding through me in a matter of minutes. I got really scared, especially because how depressed I felt. Then the "ah ha" moment... am I really unhappy for no reason, or am I poisoned?
I thought about it for a moment. Just a few days ago my mood was the best I have been in years through fasting, same with the 14 days straight I was able to be raw in the summer. So maybe I'm not unhappy, maybe I'm not a negative person, and maybe my life really isn't a mess, and my body isn't a complete disaster uncapible of being fit, healthy, or beautiful again. Maybe I am having a very strong reaction to the foods that are going in my body.
This may seem silly, but seriously this feels like a big wake up for me. It's one thing to read it, hear other people say it, but to experience it first hand... wow. I feel like I have been living this life I thought was normal, but it turns out that I can feel so much better.
Just thought I would share this. I honestly feel a little scared, wondering where to go from here. I'm sure it will all work out.
Have a rawsome day everyone.